The thing with expectations is that we usually don’t even realize we have them until they are not met. This is particularly true of newlyweds. Once you say “I do” and start living together on a daily basis, that’s when issues begin to surface. Yet, all too often we fail to even talk about them, which usually results in conflict. And it’s certainly not limited to newlyweds.
When it comes to love and commitment the message we get from society is clear –nothing lasts forever. Love, as presented in films, novels, and music, is a powerful emotion that ebbs and flows and eventually flames out. Sometimes this flameout is staggeringly short. How has the divorce culture affected our marital climate? Read on.
How you interact with your spouse on a daily basis is the single greatest factor that establishes the type of communication climate that surrounds your marriage. It isn’t “what we communicate about that shapes a relational climate,” note communication experts, “as much as how we speak and act toward one another.” How can I assess the climate of my marriage? Read more to find out.
More and more of today’s engaged couples are seeing the benefits of saying, “I do,” to premarital counseling and education. In fact, research shows that couples that seek out premarital education enjoy a 30% lower chance of divorce than the couples who do not. But before heading out the door to your first appointment, you need to consider the importance of whom you choose to counsel you.
We live in a sexualized culture, and our exposure to pornography is staggering. A simple click gets us free and instantly available porn—images, videos and erotic stories—on every device we own. Ten years ago the book Pornified described how our relationships and families were being transformed by pornography. Today our exposure to pornography is in uncharted territory.
Over-sharing on social media has become rampant. Whether it’s the latest video blog of a husband showing how he got his wife’s urine sample out of the toilet for a surprise pregnancy test (I’m not kidding!) or an angry wife’s post fresh off an argument with her husband, there is such a thing as too much information!
A fascinating study done by relationship experts at Heriot Watt University in Edinburgh sought to determine if romantic comedies influenced how we view love, sex, and marriage. They specifically examined 40 box office hits between 1995 and 2005, such as Runaway Bride, Notting Hill, You’ve Got Mail, Maid in Manhattan, and While You Were Sleeping. Have you seen any of them? If so, researchers were interested in how they might influence your expectations about love.
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