February has a way of stirring up expectations, especially as Valentine’s Day approaches. For some, it’s a sweet celebration. For others, it quietly highlights disappointment, comparison, or unmet hopes. And often, that disappointment isn’t because someone didn’t care enough. It’s because one single day has been loaded with so much pressure that no gesture could realistically carry the weight.

We live in a world of curated romance, highlight reels, ads, and social media posts that subtly tell us what love should look like. No wonder so many couples feel paralyzed by Valentine’s Day expectations, and so many singles feel left out altogether. When love is measured against an idealized standard, it’s easy to walk away discouraged.

But what if Valentine’s Day became less about measuring up and more about remembering a love that never does?

A Love That Holds Up Under Pressure

The apostle Paul prays something profound in Ephesians 3:17–19, that we would be rooted and established in love, and that together we would grasp how wide and long and high and deep the love of Christ truly is. This isn’t sentimental love. It’s sturdy love. Love that sustains us when romance disappoints, relationships strain, or loneliness creeps in.

Let’s sit with those words for a moment.

His Love Is Wide

God’s love stretches farther than we imagine. Scripture tells us that our sins are removed “as far as the east is from the west” (Psalm 103:12), a distance without end. It’s a love with room for failure, growth, repentance, and restoration.

We also experience the width of God’s love in community. Paul reminds us that we grasp this love together with all the saints. We weren’t meant to experience love in isolation. Whether you’re married, single, dating, or somewhere in between, God often reveals His love through His people, through shared meals, honest conversations, and faithful presence. His love is wide enough to hold us all.

His Love Is Long

God’s love isn’t fleeting or conditional. It didn’t begin when you “got it right,” and it won’t end when you get it wrong. Before time began, God set His love on you (Ephesians 1:4). And nothing, neither today’s failures nor tomorrow’s fears, can separate you from that love (Romans 8:38–39).

In a culture that often treats love as disposable, God’s love endures. It shows up again tomorrow. And the next day. And the day after that. His love keeps no record of wrongs and doesn’t grow weary of us. His love is long.

His Love Is High

Some aspects of God’s love will always stretch beyond our understanding. It exists beyond our emotional capacity, beyond our language, beyond our lived experience. Yet it surrounds us fully, like air we breathe but rarely notice.

Even spiritual forces beyond what we can see cannot separate us from this love. God’s love is not fragile. It reigns above our circumstances, our doubts, and even our suffering. His love is high.

His Love Is Deep

This may be the most personal dimension of all. God’s love reaches into the places we’d rather hide, the places of shame, grief, fear, and longing. And when it finds us there, it doesn’t recoil.

Scripture tells us that even in the depths, God is present. He meets us there not with condemnation, but with mercy. He makes us alive even when we feel stuck, numb, or broken. God’s love descends into our deepest places and lifts us up with tenderness and power. His love is deep.

A Better Valentine

So as Valentine’s Day approaches, it’s okay to name your hopes honestly. It’s okay if you wish for more, more connection, more effort, more love. But it’s also an invitation to anchor your expectations in a love that will not disappoint.

God’s love doesn’t depend on flowers, plans, or perfect words. It meets us where we are and offers more than we could ask or imagine.

And that kind of love?
That’s worth celebrating, on Valentine’s Day and every day after.

*Adapted from A Valentine That Won't Disappoint! by Lori Ann Bach